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English fun and pun
The great "Pun"dits say....
• The person who invented the door knock .........won the No-bell prize.
• I couldn't work out how to fasten my seat belt. ......... Then it clicked.
• Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. ......... Dirty Fellows.
• I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. ......... All I did was take a day off.
• To the guy who invented Zero: ......... Thanks for nothing!
• Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, ......... then it just becomes a soap opera.
• Enough with the cripple jokes! . ......... .I just can't stand them.
• Is google a woman? Because it won't let you finish your sentence ......... without coming up with other suggestions.
• Want to hear a construction joke? ......... I'm working on it
• A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. ......... It marks the end of his sentence.
• I'm going to stand outside, so if anyone asks I'm outstanding.
• I have a few theories about unemployed people. ......... But never mind; none of them work
• 2 antennas met on a roof and got married. ......... The wedding was ok, but the reception was incredible.
• Where do TVs go on vacation? ......... To remote islands!
• Sleeping comes so naturally to me, ......... I could do it with my eyes closed.
• A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said .........' No change yet'.
• There was an explosion at a pie factory; ......... 3.14 people died.
• There was once a cross-eyed teacher .........she just couldn't control her pupils.
• I am selling my guitar, ......... no strings attached!!
• I usually take steps .........to avoid elevators.....
Enjoy the pun and fun of the English language!!
The great "Pun"dits say....
• The person who invented the door knock .........won the No-bell prize.
• I couldn't work out how to fasten my seat belt. ......... Then it clicked.
• Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. ......... Dirty Fellows.
• I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. ......... All I did was take a day off.
• To the guy who invented Zero: ......... Thanks for nothing!
• Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, ......... then it just becomes a soap opera.
• Enough with the cripple jokes! . ......... .I just can't stand them.
• Is google a woman? Because it won't let you finish your sentence ......... without coming up with other suggestions.
• Want to hear a construction joke? ......... I'm working on it
• A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. ......... It marks the end of his sentence.
• I'm going to stand outside, so if anyone asks I'm outstanding.
• I have a few theories about unemployed people. ......... But never mind; none of them work
• 2 antennas met on a roof and got married. ......... The wedding was ok, but the reception was incredible.
• Where do TVs go on vacation? ......... To remote islands!
• Sleeping comes so naturally to me, ......... I could do it with my eyes closed.
• A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said .........' No change yet'.
• There was an explosion at a pie factory; ......... 3.14 people died.
• There was once a cross-eyed teacher .........she just couldn't control her pupils.
• I am selling my guitar, ......... no strings attached!!
• I usually take steps .........to avoid elevators.....
Enjoy the pun and fun of the English language!!